Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Happy Birthday Paul

2 years ago our first baby was born. His name was Paul Hudson Rogers. It is a strong name, given to a strong boy. He was 8lbs 15ounces. His legs were thick, his arms were thick, his feet were huge, and his head was a big Rogers head. We had been looking forward to him for months. God had filled our little apartment with all the baby essentials through the gifts of others. We even had a blue wall ready for our firstborn boy.

Two years ago our baby boy Paul was still-born. It was the worst day of our lives. No words can describe the shock, the agony, and the pain of that day and the days following. We got to hold him, but for such a short time. We told him we loved him a thousand times. Then we buried him in the ground. And with his little casket we felt like we had buried our joy and our future.

Two years later we are celebrating Paul's short life. Today we have cried. We have written him a letter. We went out to eat at a restaurant that we visited often while Stephanie carried him. We visited his grave. Today was a good day. Today we thanked God for giving Paul to us; for letting us read him stories, and feel him move, and hold him, and change our lives. Then we visited his grave. Two years ago we buried our joy and our future with our firstborn son. Today we realized God has restored our joy, and sustained our faith. Today we know that part of our future is there, but it is not a joyless future. Today we looked forward to the day when Christ returns and resurrects baby Paul's little body from the earth, for "we will not all sleep, but we will all be changed--in a flash, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trumpet. For the trumpet will sound, the dead will be raised imperishable, and we will be changed. For the perishable must clothe itself with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality. When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come true: "Death has been swallowed up in victory" (1 Cor. 15:52-54).

Today we looked back, and we cried. Today we looked forward and we rejoiced.

We miss you Paul Hudson. See you soon.

7 comments:

sherry said...

I love you guys and I thought of you often today. It's strange how time changes things. We still grieve Paul's death, but are able to rejoice in ways that we could not rejoice two years ago. Although I can't begin to understand, know that I am remembering Paul with you today.

Tony Kummer said...

Thanks for writing about this. It has encouraged me.

dad said...

Words cannot express how we feel, not only in the loss of our first grandchild, Paul, but also in the pain we know you have gone through. I think the hurt is getting easier to live with, only because it pales with time. I think of Paul daily and can't wait to meet him. I know then I will be able to hold and play with him in my Father's house. Please know that we are parying for you continuiously and looking forward to seeing you. Thanks for the words of love Mark.

Mark and Stephanie said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Tasha said...

I am praying for you. I am glad to see how God is moving in your lives!

Phil Rogers said...

We were thinking of you all day and think of Paul all the time. It is still very hard to accept, but we are all healing out of necessity. Paul is not forgotten and we love him and you all very much. This day will always be remembered as Paul's day and puts a smile on our face despite the grief that goes with it. We love and miss you.

Phil, Jill, and Luke

Jenni Price said...

Mark and Stephanie, thank you for sharing your hearts. You both are blessings and I am challenged to pursue Christ deeper because of your lives. We are going through Romans at church and a few weeks ago the message was full of hope for the day when we will see loved ones raised in glory. The message was from the passage you shared from in 1 Corinthians 15 based off of Romans 8:11. I don't know if you have time but I would encourage you to listen to it. I was overwhelmed with the goodness of our Heavenly Father and the hope that is promised to those who believe.